promiscuous-petal:

enough about sex positions has anyone discovered a reading position which doesn’t get uncomfortable after 5 minutes

edrockbells:

i am that person who constantly jiggles their leg i’m s orry

not-burnie:

Apparently my little brother was watching porn on my older brother’s Netflix account so he wouldn’t get caught but plot twist my older brother was doing the same thing with my younger brother’s account and now they’re both grounded and I’m the only one allowed on Netflix

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Take Me to Church
Hozier — PLAYED 1,824 TIMES

thedailytwerk:

Take Me to Church - Hozier

Bread For Brat
The Hidden Cameras — PLAYED 80 TIMES

thedailytwerk:

Bread For Brat - The Hidden Cameras

how-absurd-she-was:

can-u-not-my-wayward-son:

This week on "Tumblr: Why the Website You Know and Love Is A Fucking Joke"

What the shit

officialheinzdoofenshmirtz:

darkwingsnark:

officialheinzdoofenshmirtz:

you have 10 seconds to think of a way to make the average vampire movie fresh and new and exciting again

A vampire going through the daily struggles of trying to hide his ever lasting boner— as rigor mortis is an unkind friend. 

JE SUS

sn0w72897:

calamity-cain:

geekishchic:

This is how you know they’re actually brothers.

this is my favourite scene in the movie i’m not even kidding

I love this scene the most, because Loki is somewhat trying to help and Thor is just done.

crocobaby:

Do you think every president goes through a awkward first few weeks in office when they’re not sure when’s the right time to ask if aliens are real or not?

deaneggsandsam:

when u sneeze in front of your pet and they look like you’ve just offended their great ancestors

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anglosexualsunited:

i like where this man’s priorities lie